Torture Methods

     So once upon a time in one of my other posts, I said I'd talk about this... Well here it is. My favorite one was when someone did something worthy of a torturous punishment, they were taken into custody and made to drink milk and honey (lots of nasty BMs) and is forced to stand still while they were cut several hundred times all over their body. The cuts were only about an inch long and very shallow, like a paper cut. I just found out why those are so painful-it's because of the nerve endings in your skin... Interesting. So these people were frickin' smart.  Then they'd strap the guy to a boat, butt-naked (buck-naked?), pour honey all over his body, and send him into the middle of a reservoir pond place where there are LOTS of bugs flying around. The bugs would eat the honey, but not stop there, they'd eat the prisoner guy too, which leads to excruciatingly painful infection, which brought more and more bugs and he'd eventually die from dehydration and sceptic shock. Ouch. It's called Scaphism and I think it's interesting. Don't you? Yeah, probably. Not. I'm creepy, huh?
     Next is the Brazen Bull. It's this hollow bull made of brass with a door on the side to fit a human body in. The criminal is stuffed inside and the torturers light a fire beneath it. The bull has all sorts of tubing a cork placed in it so the criminal's, now amplified, screams sound like a bull's moo or whatever it's called. Basically, the person inside is cooked to death; he is literally roasted. Could you imagine that? Being roasted like a turkey on Thanksgiving or something? Have you ever burned yourself with a straightener bad enough that your skin sticks to it? It's painful and it brings on blisters pretty quick, so you can imagine that heat, all the blisters that are near boiling...leading to more burns? Seriously, ouch. The guy who invented it was actually the first one to experience it. Oh the irony.
     Quartering. I have a funny story about that. Once upon a time, I was friends with this girl and her boyfriend. This girl's parents are NUTS! And they hated her boyfriend, but he loved her and she loved him. When he was upset at her parents, he'd tell me all about it to get it off his chest. He wanted to tie her mom to four different horses and send them running in every direction to quarter her. He didn't hate her dad as much, so he just said he'd do to him the things Westley threatened Humperdink with: leave him with nothing but ears so he could hear the shrieks of every woman, the cries of every child that fear him. Pretty funny, right? Now that I think about it, it's probably a good thing they broke up because that is a bit creepy and questionable that he'd dream of stuff like that, but whatever. I'm interested in these methods, so who am I to judge? :)
     TJ and I used to joke about a pretty funny one. If you think about it, you seriously feel the pain. It's one of those things where you're like, "uh...why would you ever do that?" and it gives you the shivers. Whenever we were at a family reunion or an awkward situation, we used to say, "I would rather stick bamboo toothpicks under my toenails and kick the wall than do that again!" Doesn't that just make you clench your toes together and give you the chills to think about it? That happens to me. Painful! I have had so many of those situations though... and sometimes bamboo toothpicks do sound better than those situations. You ever have those moments? They're not that great. In fact, they should be a torture method on their own. Right? Yes.